Oh Hey There

Life is presently, and increasingly so with the older I grow, moving at an alarming rate. I swear it was just January. It's almost April?! Thank god for that because it means that summer will be here even sooner and I can. not. wait. to have warm evenings that are lighter later, and barbecues, and lunchtime swims in the river, and shorts or sundresses as optional clothing items (without adding tights, scarves and sweaters).

This past month in particular has been one of unpredictable highs and lows. I have had challenges thrown at me with my host family as I could not really have imagined. Guys, being an Au Pair is hard. People tell you, "Oh well that's a tough job, working with kids all day and cleaning up after them blah blah blah." They're right, it is no picnic having your entire work center around children (although wondrous and inspiring and cheerful because of their budding perspective on life). Kindergarten teachers, doctors, nannies and babysitters can probably all agree on the ups and downs of working primarily with children. But as I have said before and stand by, living in the environment is a different game.

I was speaking with another Au Pair friend recently, and we discussed over cheesecake and coffee (our weakness) that what advice-givers neglect to advise about the Au Pair experience is this: however difficult or strenuous the tasks my be with the children, the tangible challenge is not the children, it is the parents. I constantly find myself working to balance my own physical/emotional needs and personal boundaries with the demands of my host mother and the time pressures she puts on virtually every single thing in my day. Even when I'm not with my host family, I'm still considering their needs and tasks in my own personal tasks, because I need to make sure to have time for them - or prepare to have time for them as I'm often asked to pick something up, run a quick errand or my personal favorite, "will you do me one favor?" with last minute urgency. That last question is the worst because it's not actually a question, there is no room for the answer of "well, actually no - I can't." I will, I have to... it's my job.

Now, this fact is not actually the worst thing in the world, however obnoxious. It just requires a conscious mind that watches out for its own well being. Sure, I wish I had known this was such a large requirement of Au Pair life before traveling thousands of miles and changing my whole life. But if I had known this was my actual job: part-time single mom and full-time personal assistant to my host mom, would I have changed my mind? Stayed in California? Gotten a job in San Francisco and stayed in my same apartment and took my dog for walks in the morning in Golden Gate Park? No. No I would not. I would have been determined to make the best, which is what I'm doing here anyways.

So however frustrating and eye-roll inducing many mornings and afternoons may be as an Au Pair, I know that I'm where I'm supposed to be. And that these kids are teaching me a lot about life and making me so gloriously happy. Listening to their little German voices parrot every English word I say is a highlight of my day. "Ah-gain. Now-ah. No-ah. Yay-as." I used to dread picking them up in the afternoon, now I am so excited to see them, as they are with me. A little bit of positivity goes a long, long way. I just have to keep remembering that. The next few months are extremely exciting as I have lots of visits by friends and sisters planned, trips to Berlin, England, Brussels, Paris, birthdays, summer.... all of it! I'm so excited about it all!

Happy Wednesday!

xo

Happy Hump Day!

Congratulations everyone, you've made it to the halfway point of the week. Post-work drinks are now acceptable as are day dreams of weekend plans.

I've been quite busy of late with some good, and some not so positive things. But today is a day I've chosen to remember and focus personally on all of the wondrous things I have going for myself. It's easy to bring the harder parts of life to the forefront of my mind, but I always feel happier when I'm able to recognize them, but focus on the better moments and people.

There's lots to come this way in updates, expect one in the next few days. And here's to coming a day closer to the weekend!

xo